I have been on a roller coaster of emotions the past little while: mostly tied in with jobs (well - the lack there of) and money (also the lack there of). Every day I sit at this computer for hours searching through new postings on job boards and, when I find ones I am qualified for, reworking cover letters and submitting resumes and cover letters in the hopes that *someone* will see the potential I have.
Make no mistake: it's hard work. And very frustrating, saddening and maddening. Eight years out of the work force while I raised my babies into the amazing little people they are doesn't seem to count for much in the real world....which sucks since children who are well loved and raised well are a tremendous asset to the world. There should be extreme value placed on the job I have been doing. These children didn't become the intelligent amazing people they are by magic. It is a ton of sweat the tears on the part of me, an incredibly dedicated mother.
(Please note: this is not to say parents who didn't or don't stay home to raise kids have anything less than amazing children as well. It's just.....different. I sacrificed everything I had and was to raise these kids 24/7. My world was/is the two of them and that is my reality. One of the sacrifices I made was walking away from a very fulfilling, very well paying job on the day I went into labor with Kelton and that sacrifice is the one holding me back now. It's hard for people to look past an 8 year gap.)
Anyway.....as I search for jobs to apply for I am struck by the fact of the other things I would so much rather be doing: baking banana bread, playing Princess Games with Kaylen, watching Kelton play the Wii, helping them with the summer school work. Just about anything other than sitting here hoping and praying for enough positions to apply for to meet my personal daily goal. Oh heck - I'd even rather be reading or writing prevera reviews.
Sure, job searching doesn't take all day. There is still time to do the other things it's just that my thoughts are consumed with needing to find a job and all the stress that goes along with that simple statement which makes it very difficult to sit back and enjoy the time I still have to spend with my babies.
Life. It's an ever evolving roller coaster ride. Nothing is constant but change...and all that.