I'm feeling sad and unsettled today. I guess the reality of the end of our playgroup is hitting now that the other moms are hooking up with new playgroups. Maybe I'm in denial that things have gotten to the point they have. It's not the kids - they aren't the reason at all. It's the moms.
We have one mom who seems bent on having confrontations with everyone about everything. It started with me and then another mom was the object of the venom. I'm not sure what it is about this one mom. She used to be a really cool person but lately religion has come into play. She wasn't always like that - it's almost like she is being taken over by the pod people. I have a hard time being civil to her when I was told she thinks D and I are going to hell because of our "lifestyle". Yeah - that was hard to swallow considering I thought she and I were friends. I don't buy into this "hate the sin but love the sinner" stuff. For me, it's a packaged deal. How can I trust her when I know how she really feels about me? Plain and simple fact is, I can't. And I don't. Not to mention she said some pretty nasty stuff about my son.......
And then there is what happened between this mom and another one of the moms. It just seems to compound and the drama is just too much for me.
So.....as a whole, the rest of the group is uneasy so we decided to stop official playgroups and meet whenever people want.
I'm sad. I've been with these people and their kids since the prince was 9 months old. I also have a hard time coming to terms with the fact that the prince won't be seeing much of the kids he has grown up with. And...I hate to say it, but it feels like they moms joining new playgroups are traitors. Ridiculous, I know. It just hurts to know they are all joining new groups.
I haven't decided what to do. I would like to join a new group but the prince is a major consideration. He's a lot to handle - I mean a lot. I'm already so afraid that people talk about him in a less than nice way. He's active. Never sits still. He has a tendancy to grab toys, sometimes to hit. I try to tell myself he's a regular, normal, healthy 3.5 year old but sometimes I wonder.
He's a lot. And I don't want anyone talking about us behind our backs. I hear enough commments about how busy he is - and I really believe it's a thinly veiled comment about how obnoxious he can be. And yeah - I feel responsible.
So....the playgroup era is over and I'm sad about it. It just feels like another loss - another thing to miss and another thing to add to my sense of loneliness.
5 comments:
I'm sorry Casey! I remember when my first playgroup dismantled, it was hard on me too.
I don't think so many people feel that the prince is out of control... I think he's just a little boy and that is what they do :).
Hugs to you Casey, I'm sorry to see this happen.
What a bummer! I'm sorry this has turned out like this. Are there a couple kids/moms that you would like to still get together with? Maybe you can setup a regular play date with them. I hope it all works out!
Casey, this traitor has tears in her eyes after reading your blog.
I'm sad too. I wish it didn't have to be this way. Maybe in time a majority of us will get back into weekly get togethers again. I think most of us didn't want playgroup to end, we just couldn't find another way out of the problems that were occurring...
It shouldn't be so complicated. :o(
Sorry about the playgroup. I just wanted to say that I too worry about what people say about my child behind our backs. Usually he is well behaved, but there have been times in this past year where I feel like I am being pointed out as a bad mother. I have been told that i shouldn't worry about it. Easier said than done, eh? Hope you can find a new group to enjoy.
People are constantly commenting about Athena, too:
"Isn't she busy!"
"She needs some attention!"
"Is she always like this?"
But really I think she's pretty good. Sure she hits and fights with other kids her age sometimes, but so far I haven't met another 3 year old who doesn't. She's a hellion, but she's only 3.
As for you going to hell? Last I knew judging other people was also a ticket to eternal damnation so I'm not sure how your religious frenemy reconciles that. But I am not above judging other people, so I'd love to post some choice comments about what I think of your "friend's" religious ideas, but I don't want to trash up your blog.
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