Ah! The Sweet Sound of Silence

D took the kids over to her moms for dinner tonight. I was invited too but I have been decorating the house all day and wanted to finish it, clean the house and have a little child-free time so I asked if she minded if I stayed behind. She didn't.

I accomplished SO much - I have a clean and peaceful house. Just look at my kitchen shine!! Aaaaaahhhhhhh! It's so wonderful to have a sparking clean house.

At least, until they arrive home.

So I'm Wondering......

....if you build it, will they really come?

I've been tossing around the idea of opening up a parenting message board that is not Yahoo based. It would be an actual board with different topic areas that caters to the lesbian parent but is inclusive of all open and accepting moms who want to join. It would host a range of "rooms" from preconception to empty nest so that there would be something for everyone. The nice thing about this set up is that if you aren't interested in reading about something, like TTC, then you can skip that room and later start reading it if you choose.

Maybe you want to talk about the teenage years...or maybe you just want a "sneak peek". There's a place for that. What about going through IVF? What about DI? What about pregnancy? Yep - rooms for all of that all within a single location.

You can even have avatars (which are pictures attached to your bio info on every post you make. It's fun!). And there are a lot of emoticons you can use (smiley faces, etc).

Another plus is your mailbox isn't stuffed to overflowing. You would go to the board to read and post.

It would be a whole new world. But....would people come?

I currently am owner of a board on Yahoo (Moms To Babies) and it just went through its first growing pain (it's a relatively new board). A big argument with people angry on all sides. Some people left, some threatened to leave, one was removed (which I am still very conflicted about). It is waaaaaaay too much drama for me. I just want to have fun, make friends, be reassured that I'm doing ok, learn new things, think about things I've never before thought. I want a place where I can stay and grow - even after my baby isn't a baby anymore.

I belong to a few different message boards and I love them. They all provide something different and yet, they have a common theme: women who are trying their best.

So I ask the rhetorical question yet again.....if I build it, will they come?

Put On Your Big Boy Pants And Deal With It!

We seem to have a big boy living at our house. Day 4 in big boy pants and going strong. Wow. I have to say, all that advice I've been given seemed to be right on the money for my little guy - I waited him out and on Saturday, when I gave him his usual choice of "Big boy pants or diaper today?" he said "Big boy pants!"

I about fell over.

We were at my sisters house for the Thanksgiving weekend and luckily I had tossed in his undies "just in case". I grabbed those Scooby Do underoos in size 4, hoisted them on his little body and away we went.

We even had a hugely successful drive home on Sunday. A four hour drive with a "pull off quick to the nearest gas station" when a little voice said "Mom? I gotta pee."

Yesterday we took a special outing to the mall to pick out two new packages of underwear. Did he want more Scooby? More Bob the Builder or Nemo? Maybe Thomas the Tank Engine?

Nope. He wanted superheroes. Spider Man and The Incredibles.

My sister would be so proud.

I'm Superman! (Well..mostly)

Your results:
You are Superman

Superman 85% Spider-Man 60% Batman 40% Supergirl 40% Wonder Woman 20% Robin 20% The Flash 20% Hulk 0% Green Lantern 0% Catwoman 0% Iron Man 0%

You are mild-mannered, good, strong and you love to help others.

Click here to take the "Which Superhero are you?" quiz...

The Attempts

Oh yes - these would be some of the photos we've taken in the quest for the perfect "Christmas Card Photo". I have to say, this was so much easier with only one child. :)

QUICK! Someone stop me!!

I can't believe what I'm doing. Are you ready for this? I've almost eaten an *entire* box of Aplets and Cotlets. Seventeen down....seven more to go.

What is it with me? I have no self control AT ALL when it comes to these delicious little things. And the worse part? I think I have a slight allergy to walnuts because my tongue always swells a bit when I eat my beloved treat.

To my credit though (I have to find *some* redeeming thing for myself) I rarely have access to Aplets and Cotlets and the only reason I have them is because they were on sale for a heck of a deal this weekend when I was visiting my sister. Ah yes - I bought three boxes. Three guilt laden, amazingly tasty boxes. And so far, I haven't shared a single one. :)

Being Thankful

It's been a long, frustrating and sad few days. My heart is really sad that when all is said and done, I may have lost a relationship with someone I consider a friend.

There were so many factors involved in everything and I wish I had been trusted with information before push came to shove.

But- what is, is. None of us can change what happens - we can only change where we go from here. I know it will take time but I sincerely hope that my friend and I can work our way through the tangles and come out on the other side.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I really do have a lot to be thankful for. So much that I'm not sure I can even write it all down. I'm thankful for my wonderful wife and partner whom without I would be lost. I am filled to overflowing with gratitude for my children - they are pure miracles and I am so blessed to have them in my life. Every day with them is a gift beyond measure.

I'm thankful for my friends - both old and new (and somewhere in between, too). Friends help make life livable, managable, fun. Thank you my friends (yes - ALL of you!) - you make my life wonderful. :)

Happy Thanksgiving!!

Ever Have One Of Those Days?

Yep - this pretty much is how I'm feeling.......

Think You Know All About Me Already? Guess Again! :)

10 Favorites
Favorite Season: fall
Favorite Sport: None
Favorite Time: Bedtime...for me!
Favorite Color: red
Favorite Actor: None
Favorite Actress: None
Favorite Ice Cream: Jamocha Almond Fudge
Favorite Food: American - as in hamburgers and fries
Favorite Drink: Peppermint Mocha
Favorite Place: The beach

9 Currents
Current Feeling: exhausted and I have a headache.
Current Underwear Color: white (boring!)
Current Windows Open: blogger and Outlook Express
Current Drink: None
Current Time: 8:10 PM
Current Mobile(s) Used: T-Mobile
Current Show on TV: Backyardigans (the prince is watching - I'm not)
Current Thought: Will the kids go down easily? with a bonus one of "What am I going to do regarding the problems on my message board?"
Current Clothes: My pink sheep pajamas

8 Firsts
First Nickname: Tree (don't ask)
First Kiss: No clue - probably Jr High
First Crush: Jay - High School
First Best Friend: Rondi
First Vehicle I drove: Ford Tarino (GAG!)
First Job: Besides babysitting? Receptionist at Supercuts.
First Movie: No idea
First Pet: a black lab-mutt named Kelly.
First Shave: Wow - hmmm....6th grade I think

7 Lasts
Last Drink : Milk
Last Kiss: my son when we arrived home from a movie
Last Time: Huh? What does this mean?
Last Time Shaved: yesterday
Last Web Site Visited: Minding Our Business
Last Movie Watched: Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire (today)
Last Pill I Had: Pamperin

6 Have You Evers
Have You Ever Broken the Law: Yes
Have You Ever Been Drunk: of course
Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn't Know: Oh yeah. Ick.
Have You Ever Been in the Middle/Close to Gunfire or Bomb Blast: No. Thank God.
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: yes
Have You Ever Broken Anyone's Heart: Yes. Several hearts. And I'm so not proud of it.

5 Things
Things You Can Hear Right The kids and D playing and laughing
Things on Your Bed: sheets, comforter, pillows, stuffed pink puppy and a soft pink blanket
Things You Ate Today: omlette, coffee, popcorn, 3-Muskateer Poppers, lasagna
Things You Can’t Live Without: coffee and my family
Things You Do When You Are Bored: watch TV

4 Places You Have Been today:
The garage
The bathroom
the front yard
the movie theater

3 Things On Your Desk Right Now:
Dora the Explorer computer game disk
a purple pen
a red hot wheels car

2 Choices
Black or White: black
Hot or Cold: cold

1 Thing You Want To Do Before You Die:
Get very, very, very old. :)

**Thanks, Cristin! Seems I'm always stealing stuff from you. :)

The Two Girls In My Life

The Tree In My Backyard

Is this not an incredible sight? Every year I anxiously await for this trees leaves to change color and every year I am in awe of nature.





This one was taken last night at sunset. It was amazing and the photo doesn't come close to doing it justice.

These Just Cracked Me Up

of course......I'm weird. :)

Stuff Portrait Friday

I'm taking part in something called Stuff Portrait Friday and this week the assignment is to take photos of:

Something that represents your past
Something that represents your present
Something that represents your future

The challenge:
And because I know your children &/or pets can fit into those, I'm challenging you to find something OTHER than the kids or the pets.

So here goes:




This is a doll cradle from my childhood because I loved playing house.



My children's jackets and shoes because that's what my life is about right now.



A rocking chair because in the future I hope to rock my grandchildren in it.

Stuff Portrait Friday - What Is It?

(Thanks Cristin - I completely stole your posting about this...lock, stock and barrel. *Grin*)

Okay Stuff Portrait Friday goes like this....

This girl Kristine has a blog called Random and Odd, she started this thing called stuff portrait friday. Basically what happens is that Kristine will think of a subject and specifically what you have to take a picture of and post on your blog. This week's pictures are:

1) Something that represents your past
2) Something that represents your present
3) Something that represents your future

And the rules are "No kids and no pets" (this week)

Every week (early in the week) she will post a new category on the left side of her blog for Stuff Portrait Fridays.

After you have posted the pictures on your blog, you leave a comment to her photos of SPF (stuff portrait fridays) and tell her that you have participated and she will come check out your blog.

Oh and the more creative the better!!

Twenty Five Of My Truths

Lately I've been reading blogs where the author writes down 100 interesting tid-bits about themselves so since I'm not eager to commit to 100 items, I thought I'd shake up the game a bit and change it to 25 Truths. I encourage all those who haven't yet played the game to do so on your blog (or in the comment section here for those who are blog-less (Brenda!)).

Here goes:

1. I always hated my birth name so I changed it 12 years ago. However lately I've been missing my "old identity" and toy with the idea of changing it back. I probably won't though - it's a lot of work to change your name. The thing that really gets me is I use my former name when I think about who I am to myself. Sometimes I even do a stutter-step when I make phone calls - it's like "Oh man! Who the heck AM I?" But that's a question for another day. :)

2. I love my daughters name but I rarely use it. I call her: the baby, my girl, my daughter, little one, baby sister, baby, your daughter, your sister, etc. I don't know why that is and it bugs me.

3. My mom drives me nuts and I'm terrified I will turn into her and that my kids will feel the same way about me as I do about her.

4. I'm scared of dying - not so much the act of dying as the fear of leaving all that I know and the people who mean so much to me.

5. My biggest regret is the years I spent in California.

6. Before my relationship with D, I used to cheat on my partners and then end up leaving them for the new person. Serial monogamy, I think is the name.

7. I have never, ever, ever cheated on D. Though I have had small crushes along the way. I've just never had a desire to mess things up this time around.

8. I was actually single and living on my own for 6 months before I met D.

9. I would love to be legally married to D. I was - for a whole year before the state of Oregon overturned it.

10. I miss having D home with us in the evenings

11. Sometimes I fear I am the worst parent on the planet.

12. My sister bugs me but there is no one else's approval I want more. I really hate that feeling. I honestly think I will never be good enough.

13. I have learned one thing in all my years: Nothing is absolute. The world is not black and white but instead it's varying shades of gray. Just because something is true for me doesn't mean it is for everyone. And just because I have decided something should go a certain way, doesn't mean it actually does.

14. Every situation is different and should be judged on its own merits. Again, it's the varying shades of gray thing.

15. People you think are your friends can, and sometimes will, be cruel.

16. I have a tendency to torment myself with things I should have said or done in different situations. I still have something from years and years ago that bugs me and I'm *still* wishing I had said something I didn't.

17. The times I torment myself with #16 is usually in the dead of night when I can't sleep.

18. I have used illegal drugs in the past.

19. I do not enjoy alcohol.

20. I like to be in control and I like things in a certain way.

21. I hate when my house is messy and yet, with kids it's impossible to stay on top of it all the time.

22. I don't enjoy being the center of attention.

23. I love getting presents. I mean REALLY love getting presents.

24. It's hard to have a December birthday because it gets lost in the shuffle of Christmas. I really hate getting Christmas cards that say "By the way, Happy Birthday."

25. I love having friends and I cherish my friendships.


I probably have more truths but for now I'm done. I am reserving the right to re-blog my truths should that be what I decide. :)

Powder, Powder Everywhere

Oh yes - you read that right. I was checking email while the dogs ate their lunch and the princess played happily with the tupperware when suddenly I smelled an really nice scent wafting through the house.

"That's odd." I thought to myself, "It smells really nice - like lavender."

Suddenly alarm bells started going off in my head.

"Prince?" I inquired, "Where are you?"

"In the living room." came the response

"What is that I smell?"

"Nothing." He said.

Now I wasn't born yesterday. The boy has learned to fib and we are working hard and fast on the "You need to tell the truth. I still might be angry but I will be so much more angry if you don't tell the truth."

I said "Prince?? What is it?"

"Here. Smell me." he says as he pushes his tummy towards me.

"Yep - that's the smell. It smells good but it's really strong. How come?"

"You gonna be mad." he said and he started walking down the hall towards his room.

"Why will I be mad?"

"You see."

We swung open his door and there it was. Baby powder all over his carpeting.

He looks at me innocently and said "Whole house smells Mmmmmm good now!"

*sigh* "Please go get the Dust Buster."

What Kind Of Freaky Mother Are You?

You're a punk rock mommy! DIY is probably your
motto, because you're a punk mama at heart.
Your kids are getting your independent spirit
and guts, and learning to solve problems
themselves. You love it when they show their
independence, even when it's breaking your
heart.


What kind of a freaky mother are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Oy! It starts so soon!

"I want a pool table!"

Oh yes, that would be what my three year old just spent five minutes yelling. I kid you not.

He saw a commerical for Hanes where two guys are playing a game of pool and he says to me " Mama - I want a pool table for Christmas." I said "That would be fun but I don't think that will happen this year. We just don't have the room right now."

To which a full-force melt down took place.

I finally said "You're three. Three year olds don't get pool tables for Christmas. End of conversation."

Yeah - right. End of conversation for me. Not the end of the melt down for the prince.

I really don't enjoy evenings

I used to. I used to love evenings - it meant my family was all together under one roof after being away during the day. Dinner would be cooking, delicious scents wafting through the air. The prince would be with D either helping her cook or entertaining her with the happenings of his day (ok - so all nights weren't the Rockwell picture I am painting but still....). I'd be plopped on the couch watching the news and catching up with the world. It was the one time of the day, no matter how crazy the day had been, that I knew I could just kick back and not be "Mom on Patrol".

I don't so much enjoy the evenings these days. By 4pm the kids are hitting meltdown and I'm not far behind and yet.....hours of work stretch out before me. I have to get dinner ready, served and cleaned up- usually with a 9 month old attached to my pant leg. I need to pick up and once again reorganize the house. Run bath time, get both in jammies and the little girl trundled off to dreamland all the while navigating potential land mines. Some nights I narrowly escape everything being blown to bits and some days, I don't even come close to escaping.

What is it about the proverbial "witching hours"? Is there a handbook out there that all children read that says "As the sun fades, start crying and fussing and carrying on....your parents will love this and will be drawn to spending time with you."? It's nuts.....and it's always, always, always the time of day I lose the battle to be sane.

Tonight was one of those bad nights. Oy.

The L-Word

So....in seven short days (actually six since we skipped a night) we managed to watch the entire 2nd season of The L-Word. What can I say except "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! I need more. MORE!! Do you hear me???" It's so not fair. I wasn't ready. I wasn't prepared. We popped in the last disc to find that, instead of 4 hour long episodes, there was only one show on it. D and I just looked at each other in disbelief. How could they do this to us??

I wish I knew someone who had ShowTime who would tape each and every 3rd season episode for me (it begins in January) but alas, I don't. This means, of course, that I will have to remain in suspense for an entire year (providing they release the 3rd season around this time next year). So. Not. Fair.

The series is great - it's so nice to see our lives portrayed like normal people (ok - normal people who have WAAAAAY too much sex and say the F word waaaaay to much but still....). Does it matter to me that not all the actors are lesbians in real life? I'm shallow enough to say yes, it bothers me a little bit. And yet, I promise to get over it. :)

Shane. *sigh* What will I do without my daily fix of Shane? :)

More On My Shane Obsession

Katherine Moennig
Born: December 29, 1976 Philadelphia
Hair/Eyes: Green/dark brown
Height: 5'8"
Cool facts: Is trained in fencing; tried out for the role of Brandon Teena in "Boys Don't Cry"
Nickname: Kate

The 28-year-old Kate was born and raised in Philadelphia, where her family business -- William Moennig & Son, Ltd., to be exact -- happens to be the most prestigious manufacturer and appraiser of violins. The Moennigs are also considered the most respected purveyors of violins in the country -- not too shabby. Still not impressed? OK -- her cousin is Gwyneth Paltrow.

**stolen from PlanetOut

This is too cool to pass up!

Now *this* is a cool deal!

Go to www.vistaprint.com/annual and you can get 10 magnets, 10 folded invites, 10 holiday cards, 100 marketing postcards OR 140 caricature labels (that's the one I went for!) FOR FREE!!!!!!

All you have to do is pay the shipping (which for 7 day shipping cost me $3.50 for the labels). The labels are great - D got them for me last year as a gift and I have loved having them. You can make the faces of the caricatures fit your family (ours has two moms, a boy and a baby girl).

Check it out of you are so inclined. :)

Proof that she just doesn't get it

I love this woman but sometimes I have to wonder about her.

Her sister and brother-in-law are out of town this weekend so we are tending to their animals (bird and cat). She went over this morning to feed them and then stayed to study. Sounds reasonable so far, yes? Sure - even I'll agree to that.

About 10 minutes ago we called to see how it was going and when we might be able to expect her (I knew it would be earlier than usual since she put in about 3 hours of studying yesterday). I'm eager for some relief - it's been a long week alone with the kids.

This is what I hear "I'm actually done but I'm trying to decide if I should come home now or wait about 2 more hours so that I can feed the animals before coming home. That way we don't have to go back tonight."


WHAT?????? ARE YOU FREAKIN' KIDDING ME????

Did she really and truly think that I wouldn't mind if she sat over there and watched TV alone for the next 2 or more HOURS??? Has she lost her mind or is she so completely blind to the fact that I need her help with the kids and that, God forbid, I need a break (not that I really get one but it's like a break in that I'm not the only parent here)? She's done studying and just hanging out??????

I absolutely do not get that line of thinking.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

I think this says it all.....

**stolen from Shawna's blog cuz she can do all sorts of cool stuff. Of course, on her blog it has lights flashing around it and I am just not cool enough to figure out how to do it. :)

Newsflash! Shawna told me how to do it and LOOK!!! It worked!!!! Cool! :) Thanks, Shawna!

Tagged, yet again. :)

I got tagged by Shawna....so here goes:

2 names you go by:
Casey
Tricia

2 parts of your heritage:
Irish
Scottish

2 things that scare you:
Speaking to a group of people
That people will find out I know nothing about anything *small smile*

edited to add more things (apparently I have a lot of things that scare me):
I'm terrified that the first memories my kids will have will be ones where I am angry at them.
I'm scared that I actually *am* a terrible parent and that I am harming my children in some as of yet unseen way.
I'm terrified of something awful happening to my kids (abduction, accident, murdered)

2 things you are wearing right now:
sweats
pink long sleeve T-Shirt

2 of your favorite bands or musical artists (at the moment)
Tret Fure
Cris Williamson

2 favorite songs (at the moment):
I just can't wait to be king
Mr. Mom

2 things you want in a relationship (other than real love):
companionship
attention

2 truths:
I have PPD and yes, I take medication for it
Sometimes I wish I could just escape my life for a while

2 physical things that appeal to you (in someone else):
eyes
smile

2 of your favorite hobbies:
my blog :)
taking pictures of my kids

2 things you want really badly:
A new digital camera (same as Shawna. I'm asking Santa for it....)
48 hours off from all responsibility

2 places you want to go on vacation:
The beach during the winter
The beach during summer (hey - it really is like two different places!)

2 things you want to do before you die:
See my grandchildren
Learn to have no regrets

2 ways that you are stereotypically a dude/chick:
I hate to get dirty
I love gossip (sad but true)

2 things you are thinking about now:
That I can't believe I just told the world that I love gossip. I sound shallow
How many episodes of The L Word will I be able to squeeze in tonight

2 stores you shop at:
Wal-Mart
Target

2 people you would like to see take the quiz?
Sonya
Catherine

Silly Kids!

Bath tub was quite the adventure tonight...ok, to be honest, it's an adventure every night.

Tonight included a bath tub game of peek-a-boo, some seriously silly dancing and a head first dive out of the tub. If you ask me, he did it all just to hear his sister's amazing belly laugh. :)

PS...check out the thighs on the princess. I was so not kidding, was I? :)

Three Times In Seven Weeks

And it's not what you might be thinking. *wink*

I have been sick three times in the past seven weeks and frankly, I'm tired of feeling like I've been run over by a truck. It sucks.

I do believe that the incredible amount of stress I am under is doing a number on my immune system. I can't even stay well enough for long enough to get my flu shot (in the hopes of warding off the flu this season since I think coming down with the flu would really knock me to the ground. Seriously.). I know lots and lots of people don't or won't get the flu shot but I'm a believer.

The princess received her first of two yesterday and the prince will get his the same time I get mine. Hopefully.

Being sick suck. Being sick with two small kids really sucks and being sick with no adult relief for caring for two small kids sucks so much I can't even tell you.

My Wife Is The Best! :)

You know my new obession with Shane from The L Word? Well - D went out looking on the web to find some pictures of her for me. I've never known anyone who would feed their partner's crushes. :)

The one of her in the glasses.....well now........*happy sigh*

My Baby is 9 Months Old Today

How is it possible that so much time has passed? Nine months ago tonight my baby girl was ensconced in the NICU surrounded by tubes and wires, under the oxygen tent thingy and pissed off at the entire world. My arms ached to hold her - and I did ever so briefly before I started throwing up. Then it was back to my room for the rest of the night. I wouldn't see her again until morning.

Her birth was supposed to be a routine repeat c-section but once she came out into the world she decided that breathing just wasn't her thing. She preferred just hanging out, free floating in the warm darkness. Pull her into the bright, cold room? Forget it! So - she held her breath and played possum. Well now - that won her a fast trip to the NICU where I still don't exactly know what took place. D went with her and showed up later in my room with pictures on the digital camera.

I did get to see her briefly about two hours after she was born. So much chaos and confusion. It was so hard to watch her being poked and prodded. Not the birth experience I had wanted for any of us, that's for sure.

But - here we are. Nine months to the day later. I have a healthy, thriving daughter who crawls all over the place, babbles incessantly (which I can't get enough of), and is growing like a weed. The trauma of her birth seems so far removed from the child she is today. With the lungs on her I don't think many people would believe that she had no interest in using them nine months ago. :)

I took her in for her nine month well-baby visit today. She weighs in at 21lbs and is 28.5 inches long (or is that tall?). My girl isn't far behind the weight and length of the prince when he was 9 months...which surprises both D and me. She seems so small to us. But then, the prince wasn't even crawling by this age and we see her cruising all over, standing alone for brief instances and doing various other things I never dreamed possible at this age.

You should see her thighs! I just have to get a picture of them. No kidding - she looks like a Summo Wrestler if you were to just look at her legs. That *has* to be where at least 5lbs of her weight is hiding (or not hiding.....). It's just too much. :)

Happy Nine Month Birthday Baby Girl! I can't imagine life without you in it. Your smile lights up my world and your laugh warms the deepest parts of my soul. I am so lucky to know you - and luckier still to love you and be loved in return.

I'm a sexy trucker that wants to be in love

NEW GAME!! What are you? Choose from the following and come up with your title:

you're a..

january- talented
febuary- lowlife
march- immature
apil- weird
may- jelous
june- loved
july- wild
august- hot
september- scary
october- messed up
november- cool
december-sexy


now pick the color shirt you have on


pink- cupcake sales person
blue- hooker
red- bartender
green- Celebrity
purple- Mc Donalds worker
white- trucker
yellow- taxi driver
black- chef
orange- homeless
gray- stripper
no shirt- millionare
other- toe nail clipper

LAST...the day you were born

1- that loves food
2- that hates kids
3- that needs attention
4- that is a murderer
5- who sucks at reading
6- who strips to pay for bills
7- who kills kittens
8- who goes to dunkin donuts everyday
9- that loves laguna beach
10- that is OCD with something
11- that is cheating on someone for $$
12- who is a bookworm
13- who is a gold digger $$
14- who licks peoples toes
15- that wants to be in love
16- who is secretly bi
17- that is a whore
18- who is anorexic
19- that wants someone they cant have
20- that owns two chinese fighting fish
21- that wants to have chinese food
22- that is obsessed with SN
23- who loves cats
24- who wants sex
25- who never brushes their hair
26- who will never have sex
27- who is a drug addict
28- who will live to be 121
29- who takes naked pictures of themselves
30- who will stay in the same place forever
31- who needs to brush their teeth

Ahhhhhhhh!

I think I may have a crush....what do you think? *big grin*

Give Me An "L"!

Ah the sweetness of it all. Season Two of "The L Word" is out and we own it. Talk about a great series! We will be starting the 4th episode tonight because even though it means *very* late nights for two overly tired mommies I just can not get enough of this show. I just have to know what happens.

D was pretty sure we’d lost our minds when we didn’t shut the DVD player off until after 11:00 last night. (she gets up at 5:00am, and I am awake on and off all night with the baby, and we'd gotten very little sleep the night before). Somehow, though, watching all those women (OK, yes, HOT women) validating our lives is totally worth it. Check ‘em out on line at: L Word On-line

D wants to be Shane when she grow up. And yes, we realize that would mean she would have to start aging backwards. Let’s put it this way, she *wishes* she had been Shane when she was younger (without all the emotional baggage but isn't that what's really fascinating about Shane? All that baggage and why she is the way she is.) Funny, D want to BE Shane, but as for me, I just want to BE WITH Shane. Works, though, doesn’t it? *evil grin*

I have a question though.... when DO the women of "The L Word" find the time to hang out in bars and coffee houses, drinking, dancing, and doing it? Oh, right, no kids yet! Hmmm.....that sure isn't my life (anymore).

Not that my life is something I want to escape from (most of the time) but day dreaming and thinking of all that is taking place on the show really does offer me a reprive from my own "stuff". Don't get me wrong, I have a great life and great family, but we all could use a good fantasy now and then!

And Shane? Well she's a great fantasy. A great big double helping of a great fantasy. :)

Shawna and Brenda - this is for you

WOW! Look what I saw while I was driving around town today. Someone knows something! :)

Who Needs Her Anyway?

Who needs D to help me do things around the house like install a new shower head in one of the bathrooms?

I don't.

Which is a good thing since I rarely ever see her these days.

I've been bugging, begging and pleading for D to install the new shower head for a couple of weeks now (I don't know why but in our relationship she's always been the one to do things like that and I am all too happy to let her continue). We had a stationary, old style in the main bathroom and I wanted one that you can take down which would make rinsing the kids' hair much easier. I bought it a year ago and it's been sitting in a closet ever since.

I was beginning to think she would never take the initiative to just change it so I thought "What the heck - I'll try it. If it all goes horribly wrong (like it did in our bathroom when we did this same thing 3 years ago) then I can call someone in to fix it." So I got out the box, pliers and plumbers tape and went to work. I was done in 5 minutes. And it doesn't leak at all.

So....I ask again......who needs her????????


I do. *sigh*

The Eagle Has Landed

The Floam, that is. Well...in all honestly, the Floam landed two weeks ago but I had put it away until the prince inquired about it last week.

I LOVE it! It's so much fun to play with!! Of course, in order to do what the show in the TV commercial you need to have a bazillion containers of it but still - the prince and I entertained ourselves for a good hour the other day. I really like the texture - it's a nice change from PlayDoh.

I'm not sure it was worth the cost though I did see it at Wal-Mart yesterday for $6 something a container so really, it wasn't much more than that to mail order it (though Wal-Mart does have some different colors available). The big difference would be that it took over a freakin' MONTH to get here. I found that to be completely unacceptable but what could I do?

So - the jury is in: Floam Is Fun! :)

It's Official

The Holiday Season Has Begun!!

For me, the defining moment is when I purchase my first box of Queen Anne Dark Chocolate Codial Cherries. This year they have introduced a new flavor - Dark Chocolate Peppermint! Could life get any better? I think not!

On top of that, I purchased the big Santa gifts today and several other smaller ones as well. The princess is done as far as gifts - I just need to get a few little things for her stocking. The prince is almost done. I haven't even begun shopping for D yet.

So bring it on - I'm ready!

What is the one thing that signals to you that the holidays are officially underway?

A Much Needed Night Out

Last night was Moms Night Out for my MOMS Club and what a night it was! The best event, hands down, is our yearly Fondue Night which is held at the home of one of our members. Let's just say that the chocolate and cheese fondue wasn't the only things flowing last night. Beer, wine and other spirits were enjoyed freely as was good conversation, raunchy conversation and downright embarrassing conversation. It was a rockin' good time!

I was one of the very few who stayed sober and, as my reward, I remember everything that happened (take note, dear friends of mine! *evil grin*). I'm not a big drinker by any stretch and knowing that my day was going to be starting at the same old time and in the same old way and my night wakings would be just as frequent as always (babies just don't seem to care if you aren't feeling well or if you have had too much to drink) kept me drinking water all night. That's not to say I *never* drink....just not often. And not last night.

But others? Well....let's just say several of them "cut loose" from their "mommy persona's". I finally called it a night at 11:30 but these three friends of mine (plus their designated driver (good call, Brenda!) and the hostess) kept the party going until after 2AM! Now I have to say - the only time I'm ever up at 2AM is for a nursing session or a trip to the bathroom. Staying up that late ON PURPOSE with young children? No way - ain't happening! Just call me old. :)

I am sad that I missed out on those last hours. I hear it got even more out of control. Dancing, laughing, falling over.........sounds like fun to watch! :)

I hope that everyone is feeling ok by now. I know that two of the three had rough days today (the third was doing great when I talked with her this afternoon). Hang in there, girls.....you have a whole year to recuperate - unless we can talk Kyle into hosting a mid-year Fondue Night. :)


Just getting the party started!

Photic Sneeze Reflex

So? Do you suffer from it? I do...and so do both kids.


*snip*

Photic sneeze reflex: A disorder, also known as the achoo syndrome, characterized by nearly uncontrollable paroxysms of sneezing provoked in a reflex fashion by the sudden exposure of a dark-adapted subject to intensely bright light, usually to brilliant sunlight. The number of successive sneezes is usually 2 or 3, but can be up to about 40. (The condition was once called the helio-ophthalmic outburst syndrome.)

The photic sneeze reflex is much more common than has been generally recognized. In one study it was found in 23% of medical students. The syndrome is one of the most frequent of all known genetic traits. It is inherited in an autosomal dominant manner, affecting males and females alike, who have a 50:50 chance of passing the achoo gene to each of their children who will have the disorder. The syndrome was first described in 1978.

One physician reported that he had suffered from photic sneezing for over 20 years and, having just learned of the existence of the syndrome, found that the "symptoms are more easily tolerated if you can put a name to them, even if that produces only an illusory understanding of their significance." He commented on the potential hazards of photic sneezing if it occurs while one is driving a car on a sunny day. Tunnels and shadows created by tall buildings and forested terrain can induce sneezing upon re-entering the bright sunlight.

*end snip*

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to good manners and elegance. In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored. You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring. You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please. Your ideal relationship is open. Both of you can talk about everything... no secrets. Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment. You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage. In this moment, you think of love as something you can get or discard anytime. You're feeling self centered.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

Is It Really Only Tuesday?

Let's just say it's been a really, really, really long week. If I don't get some serious downtime soon I'm going to lose it.

D's family is little to no help these days and my family is too far away (not that I think they would be much help even if they were closer). D's sister has been "too busy" to come over the last four Thursday afternoons to give me a break (unless of course it was right at nap time and frankly, if the kids are napping, that's where you'll find me too so what was the point of having her over then? I'd have actually *lost* down time) and she cancelled at the last minute last night to help me take the kids Trick or Treating. (Uuuuuhhh..yeah thanks. That was thoughtful.)

It's been raining like crazy here - which I love - but I think it's adding to the fact that I don't even feel like getting dressed in the mornings. Oh sure- I take a shower (I'm not *that* gross!) but forget "real" clothes...it's sweats and a t-shirt (sans the bra....what's the point? It's a pain to latch and relatch a million times a day for nursing). I even go so far as to put on make-up (don't get excited - I only do my eyes) but unless I'm going someplace, I can't even be bothered to blow dry my hair. Nope - it just lays there all day limp as a ragdoll. What do I care? Who am I trying to impress?

I could have gone to the Kindergarten Readiness program (preschool type program) on Monday but.......yeah, that didn't happen. I just wanted a down day. Today was MOMS Club but.....didn't go to that either. The thought of chasing around the prince just didn't do it for me (not to mention the princess still has a runny nose and I am still feeling less than great from the cold she gave me).

I'm tired. I'm tired of parenting alone and I'm tired of feeling like nothing I do matters. I'm tired of cleaning the house only to have it look like a tornado hit within the hour and I'm sick of laundry and dishes....they are never ending.

I want to go back to the coast, rent a nice room on the beach, open the windows wide and listen to the waves crash violently on the sand. I want to actually BE alone instead of just feeling alone.

I want...I want...I want. Not that it matters because this is what it is. *sigh*