If you are a mom who has children watching your every move, who count on you to keep their world together, who rely on you more than any other person on the planet....you get this.
This is what we do.
"You intend to be stoic…strong…a champion…even knowing as you promise yourself this that in reality you will crumble to the floor in a heap and scream and cry and pound your fist at the injustice.
And then… you will rise. You will be stoic. You will have faith. Because really…what other choice do you have? After all, your children will be watching."
Your children are watching. I know mine are. They are looking for chinks in my armour - anything that will belie my outward appearance of everything is fine and dandy - that I have it all handled and nothing can rattle me so deeply that it can't be fixed by a decent night's sleep. They are watching me when I say "It's ok. Everything is fine. You are fine and we are fine together." When I say "We are very lucky. We have people who love us and want the best for us." When I tell them that, in a few years we will look back over this time and be amazed and how far we have come. When I cuddle them and tell them it won't always hurt this much or that something that seems so enormous to them will, in time, grow smaller.
I can't fall apart in their line of sight. I have to remain steady in front of them. Falling apart is reserved for showers and late in the night and Facebook updates. People often tell me "I don't know how to do it." My answer is simply "I have no choice."
What other choice do I have? My children are watching.