Friday, October 31, 2008

Mama Bear and her Cub

In case anyone is wondering, I have *very* strong Mama Bear instincts when it comes to my children. One wrong look just may get you into trouble. Which is exactly what a student on Kelton's bus found out today. No one messes with my kid. No one.

Kelton got off the bus yesterday and one look was all I needed to know something was up. He ran up to me and started to spill everything. Apparently an older student had been bullying him for a few weeks; nothing Kelton couldn't handle apparently because this is the first I've heard of it. The boy was calling him names but stuck mostly to "stupid" and his younger brother was threatening Kelton that his brother was going to beat him up. (I asked why he hadn't told me and he said it didn't really bother him until now. Now he was scared.)

What brought this on? Well - from what Kelton can tell it was because the older boy and his brother found out that Kelton had kissed (on the neck) a girl from his class. Kelton told me about it the day the "kiss" happened and we had a heart to heart about why that isn't ok to do and, in the end, he knows he should never do it again. To me, it is totally a no big deal thing in the context it happened. I waited though and talked with Kelton about the possibility that he would be called to the office to discuss it. He never was and I assumed that was the end of it.

Apparently the older boy has been holding it over Kelton's head as a handy way to torture my poor kid.

Yesterday the older boy got physical. He grabbed Kelton, hit me, yanked a flyer out of his hands and called him names while threatening to "beat him".

Mama ain't havin' none of that.


I called the office immediately and was informed it needed to be in writing and sent with Kelton to his teacher who would then send it to the office. That could actually take a full day which would mean it probably wouldn't be handled until Monday.

Again, Mama ain't havin' none of that.

We were going in for parent teacher conference anyway (another post) so I hand delivered the letter to the office and was assured it would be given to the principal when she arrived in the morning.

Still not good enough for me.

I sent an email to the principal (who I have gotten to know because of the PTO) to inquire as to whether she got the letter and to ask for an update as soon as she had it.

I then put Kelton on the bus and had him tell his driver (yesterday was a sub. but his regular driver was back today). I heard her clarify the child's name and then she looked at me and nodded a nod of understanding.

Meanwhile, the principal wrote back that she had the letter and she would be meeting the bus when it arrived this morning to talk with both boys and the driver. She would be in touch after that.

By the time Kaylen and I returned from play group there was a message on the machine from the principal. The boy was not on the bus this morning but she did talk with the driver and it was determined that the boy, for the time being, will have an assigned seat near the driver. When the boy arrived at school, she brought both kids to her office to talk. The boy admitted what he had done (good first step!) and apologized to Kelton. After talking, the boys decided that they could be friends. Kelton was told that if anything like this happened again he was to come right to the principal.

So...all in all I'm happy with the resolution and I am relieved that I don't have to visualize myself storming the bus and having a talking to to the other boy. :) Because let me say this again - no one messes with my kid. No one makes him feel unsafe and afraid. No one.

I hate that kids are mean. And I dread the day that my kid is the mean one....and I hope like hell it doesn't happen. But I don't have on rose colored glasses about it either.

Being a mom is tough sometimes. *sigh*

9 comments:

Unknown said...

I am so glad it was a happy ending! Poor Kelton. He is such a sweet boy, why would anyone want to harm him. I betcha the other boy was just jealous that Kelton kissed the girl and he didnt. Jeri

Julie said...

Glad to hear its been resolved.

Mimi said...

Isn't that funny that we can take alot from people...but let someone mess with our baby....OMG hold us back.....give Keltn a big hug from me......

Tribe Mama said...

Good for you, I would have done the same thing...heck I HAVE done the same thing. Good mama's let the child fall when it is safe to do so, but when needed, we rear up and take care of business!

Unknown said...

Glad the issue was quickly resolved, and good for *you* that you demonstrated a way to solve the problem, instead of just teaching him to throw a punch.

Anonymous said...

We could sit over coffee and tell stories. I am the same mama bear as you. I stand for nothing when it comes to my kids. My 1st grader was told a few weeks ago that he couldn't play with certain kids on the playground because he wasn't in their club. 1st grade! He is 6 and already being told he can't join such and such club. I talked to his teacher who then talked to the class about friendship, treating others right and clubs. I was happy about her response but I really wish I could be a fly on the wall during his day at school!

Heidi

Casey said...

Heidi: Me too!!! Drop me an email, will you? casey784@comcast.net

Thanks!

Catherine said...

Aw, that sucks! You handled it well. It is heart breaking to handle this stuff.

Froggymama said...

Hell hath no fury...

This motherhood stuff is heartbreaking. But it sounds like you handled everything perfectly.

Give Kelton a smooch from us too!