Thursday, December 03, 2009

On The Record

I want to go on the record, loud and clear, that I could not ever have asked for a better person with whom to share all these years. I could never have dreamed of a better person with whom to create children and raise them. (And we will continue to raise them together - no matter how hard the beginning may be.)

She is a great parent and her love for the children is strong and true.

It takes two. We both made mistakes along the way (and we did amazingly well at at other times).

So be kind. To both of us. She is hurting like I am and I'm positive she isn't just skipping through this - she is acutely aware. We see the whole thing very differently but what in life isn't like that? If the anonymous poster who posted a mean comment to her came from here, stop. Neither one of us will tolerate bad-mouthing the other.

We have children together. We will always be family. And I am so grateful for that.

8 comments:

Heather said...

You are so true. Negativisms are not a positive thing during this sad time. As I was taught if you do not have anything nice to say then do not say anything at all (or type it). What both of you need is the support of friends not non-friends tossing a wrench in the already going flame. I hope the best for the two of you whatever may take place. The kids are what they need to be the priority of you both and yourselves.

SJayneI said...

Casey........my heart really goes out to you. I went through all of these same feelings a year and a half ago. We ended up working it out, but we are still struggling and I honestly cannot say if we will always be together.

It is a horrible pain and nothing will ease it except pushing through it. You cannot go around, under, or over it......only through. I'm sure the other side will feel some better than what you are feeling now.

You are both going to be OK, and the kids will be ok as well.

Let me know if there is anything I can do for either of you.

Catherine said...

Ignore the mean comments, they don't know you. There are lot of people who get off on kicking people when they are down (those are the same people that glare or make a comment at you when your child throws a tantrum at the mall). Delete them, banish them from your minds. They have their own troubles or they wouldn't be like that. You don't need to defend yourself or Dakota to anyone. What happened is between the two of you, and the world is grey, not black and white. Please take time and take care of yourself.

Tribe Mama said...

Excellent attitude Casey...you will forever be parents together, and that will take strength and understanding.

Lynilu said...

You're to be commended, Casey, for taking this stand. It is difficult for all four of you, and it is so essential that you and D work together in raising the children. No gets out of a marriage without pain, ever. You children will thank you for making sure they both feel loved and for seeing mutual respect. I'm sorry it is happening, but I'm so glad you are both putting the kids' welfare at the top.

Anonymous said...

Well said. I praise both of you for going through this with respect in mind. You both are such great people and wonderful parents. I am still in shock but life does go on and I know that there is blessings for both of you in the future.

Heidi

Tina said...

Unfortunately, when a relationship ends there has to be a "bad guy". No one wants to be that person b/c of the stigma associated with being the person who "ended" it all. I know. I was just there. While I should have been the person to step up, I didn't. I waited b/c I didn't want to be deemed the "bad guy". While I'm not defending Dakota, I'm also not blasting her either. This is a terrible situation for all involved. As others have said, if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.

I hope that comments posted don't discourage either person to stop blogging their feelings. It's cathartic and sometimes just needs to get out. By them blogging we can find a way to support, otherwise we may not know what to do.

Tina

Audra said...

It's great to see that, at the very least it looks like you two are trying to be good parents for the kids, and are trying to work through this the best you can. It sucks that people are leaving inappropriate comments, which I'm sure do nothing to help things.