Thursday, December 01, 2005

I'm feeling bitchy

Ok - there you have it. I'm feeling bitchy today. People are pissing me off right and left and I would love the opportunity to reach through the computer screen and smack some of them. I am sick to death of mothers who think they know all there is to know about everything. They have answers for everyone and everything. They know the right ways, the wrong ways to do absolutely everything. They won't hesitate in the slightest to tell you all the horrible things you are doing and just what they think if each and every one of your parenting decisions. They will stop at nothing and please, let us not forget that they are 100% correct in every single thing they do and say.

Oh Please.

I'm sick of people having this "holier than thou" approach to everything. The subject matters not - it could be potty training, bottles, pacifiers, forumla vs breastfeeding, circumcision, what time your child goes to bed, television, carseats, food choices.....the list is longer than I am tall. What gives people the right to vomit their opinions all over everyone else?

I'm a firm believer in doing whatever works for your family. I have absolutely no vested interest in what goes on in your lives. None. Nada. I have no need to agree with you or try to make you see "the errors of your ways" because I don't believe we need to agree (though I do believe we need to be respectful). I also believe that if you are truly doing your best and making decisions based on your family and your child then there is no error to point out. What works for you, works for you and that's great.

And on the flip side, what works for me, works for me. No one should be put in the position of feeling like a bad parent. I think we all doubt ourselves enough (and honestly, if you don't doubt yourself to some degree, I think you are just fooling yourself) and we don't need another person adding to our insecurity and pain. We don't need thinly veiled digs either.

There are those people out there who do have some need to feel superior to the rest of us. And honestly, I think those people are the most unstable and insecure among us. And that, my friends, makes them dangerous people to befriend.

I have no need to surround myself with people who think they know everything. The people I want in my life are people who struggle like I do, who question things, who are willing to listen and offer support without feeling the need to say "This is the right way. Do it like this or you will be sorry."

Oh - and for the record, I sincerely believe that with age, comes wisdom. It's only logical. With age comes experience, with experience comes wisdom. If A then B. If B, then C. Therefore A = C.

Vent over - at least for now. I'm pretty keyed up over some things.

9 comments:

em1__mak2 said...

I'll second what she said.

Anonymous said...

You are absolutely right.

As mother’s we should support one another. No one has the right to judge. What works for one family may not work for another. Or in my case – what works for one child, doesn’t work for the other. Every child and every family is unique.

From my experience it is often people without children who feel the need to judge. Or new parents who have yet to enter “The World of Toddlers”. Their time will come and they will find themselves eating their words.

I’m sorry you have been attacked. Your friends and family know what a wonderful and loving mother you are. More importantly your kids feel and experience your love every day.

Mommy said...

*getting down on my hands and knees and repeatedly bowing down to you over and over and over*

may the eyes that need to read it please READ IT!!!

soooooooooooo sickkkkkkkkkkk of itttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!

huggles to you, wise and outspoken one!
*wink*
signed,
definately not the perfect mother and so glad i'm not!
rae

Catherine said...

Casey, I know why your mad and you have a right to be. Did you notice I defended you? Anyway, I believe like you being a Mom is hard and no one has a right to tell you their opinion of your parenting. YOu are right we are hard on ourselves, so why should others. And you are right the perfect ones are probably those most messed up. I have strong opinions on certain subjects but I am not going to discuss them with anyone unless invited and I am certainly not going to judge someones parenting. I hope you feel better

Casey said...

Catherine,
I did notice - thank you SO much! I really appreciated it. :)

Jen said...

Amen, Casey!

Laura said...

Casey, exactly what Rae said!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lois said...

AMEN!

Sonya said...

Well said Casey. Loved Rae's response... so I'll copy her if she doesnt mind!

Don't ya just love the backhanded and sly way of telling you that you are a piece of shit parent???

I'm still lurking... thank goodness or my fingers would have gotten me into a whole crap load of trouble :).

I just don't need it.

Hang tough!