I have a friend, Jen, who rocks. She has four kiddos and a wit that will not stop. Her blog, in many ways, echos my experience with parenting, school, anxiety, etc. and helps me feel well.....less alone and crazy. I *get* what she writes.
Like this one from today.
A brief snip it....
"I had an epiphany recently, brought on by a combination of Miss A's bewilderment over a former friend ignoring her now, P's goldfish longing and subsequent grief, and Miss A's wild hope that the Tooth Fairy will spirit her away to Neverland. Their hopes make me heartsick with the fear (or knowledge) that they'll go unrealized, and the discomfort -- both emotional and physical -- is so great that I want to rip the dressing off the wound and have it over with. The Tooth Fairy? A lie! Your pet fish? A goner! Your friend? She doesn't think you're cool enough! Now let's move on, to more solid ground where your pain doesn't threaten to swallow me up at every turn.
I get that. "Their hope makes me heartsick with the fear (or knowledge) that they'll go unrealized, and the discomfort -- both emotional and physical -- is so great.."
*sigh*
Read the whole post. You won't be sorry. And Jen? I love ya, babe. I love your honesty and your emotion...and I love that I have known you for over 9 years now and get to call you "friend" even though you live far, far away and we have never met face to face. Remember those days on Storknet? Your perfect maternity pants? You kept me entertained our entire pregnancies. YOU ROCK!
3 comments:
Casey-
You don't know me and I don't know you, but I have a question totally unrelated to this post.
I just had a baby :) Yay! However, this has raised an issue I'm not sure how to handle. My husbands father is gay and in a commited relationship. In the hospital his dad asked me if it was okay to have our son call his partner "grandpa Paul". At the time I said it was okay as I was still in a blur, having just given birth, but I'm really not okay with it now. I don't know how to tell him that we don't want him to call him grandpa. It's a very sticky situation and I don't want to hurt anyones feelings although I know it will. My husband wasnt' really raised by his dad, so he has no conection to his partner and I feel like grandpas are special people and that's a big title to give someone you don't really know. Does that make sense? Do you have any advice/ideas/resources on how we could handle this? Any ideas on alternative names? I know it's a long ways away before he'll be calling anyone anything, I just want to be prepared :)
Thanks in advance for any input. I was scouring the internet for information on this and google wasn't cutting it. I visit your blog often and thought you might have some insight.
Casey, you're awesome. Thank you!
Anonymous, will the child call your husbands' father grandpa? If it was reversed and the father had a new wife, would the child call her grandma? Or if his mother is married, is that husband grandpa? I have "step grandparents" but they have always just been my grandma and grandpa. Also, how long have they been partnered? Like you said there is a lot of time to decide, maybe it will give you and your husband time to know this man and seem him as more then just "a special friend" becuase really if they are in a long term relationship, you are downgrading their relationship and will most likely make them feel less then, if you choose this route. My mom and her husband have only been married about 6yrs (so I did not grow up with him and don't really know him well) and he is still my sons grandpa. Good luck.
Sorry Casey, just had to respond. :)
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