I am feeling kind of lost tonight. After a super great weekend, I think I am having a bit of trouble with re-entry to real life. On top of that, a friend posted a picture on Facebook of her and I when we were about 11 years old and, while I don't remember the moment in time that the camera had frozen, just seeing the little kid me brought a rush of "homesick feelings".
I found I had this strong urge to pick up the phone and dial my childhood phone number. Maybe it would be like a time warp and my mom would pick up....or maybe even the child version of me. Maybe I would hear the voices and noises in the background that had been the sound track to my life back then. Dishes clanking in the kitchen, the table being set, the dishwasher loaded, the sibling arguments, my parents voices....all of it that, until I saw that photo tonight, were miles and miles from my thoughts.
I know you can't go back home. I really do know that. After all, the phone number that reached my childhood home from 1964 until 2004 most likely belongs to someone else (and yet, it is still the number I dial whenever I try out new keypads. Those digits are forever ingrained in me - part of who I am.) and my childhood home was sold back in 2004. Yep - I know you can't go back home but tonight? Tonight I really wish I could. Tonight I am missing days gone by and all the safety and security of being a child...and all because of a photo that froze a millisecond in time.
A picture is worth a thousand words and a million feelings.