Feeling Overwhelmed by the Endless To-Do List
I have so much to do. So much. So why aren't I doing it? Why do I sit here trying to distract myself from the seemingly kajillion things that need to be done. Sure, I can rationalize it by saying "The kids are asleep, it's late. I'm exhausted. No sense starting anything right now that might wake them and besides, this is the only free time I have in the day." As true as those things are - I still feel guilty for not doing something "productive". (Blogging is "productive", right? :) )
For months now I have been wanting to copy and paste posts from my blog into a word document so that I can print it off and keep it safe for my kids. The things I write about them I want them to have for when they are older. I have a fear that I will die and my babies will never truly realize how much I loved and cherished them. So I want it in print. I want it bound in a book that they can take with them into their adult lives. And yet, every day my posts increase in numbers and I have yet to begin copying and pasting. Part of me wonders if I could hire someone to do it for me. :) (I know - that's pretty sad.)
I have a birthday gift to wrap, another gift to wrap and ship and a third that still needs to be bought before it can be wrapped and shipped. Oh - and then there is still another gift that I need to buy for the end of the month that will be hand delivered.
I have a kitchen floor that is in desperate need of a good ol' fashioned scrubbing. For the life of my I just don't get the bright idea behind the divots in vinyl flooring. Yeah yeah - it's to trap the dirt and keep it from wafting across the room like an old western film and yet - it's just a ridiculous thing to have on our flooring because the dogs and kids track in so much mud and dirt and it all becomes ground into the divots. Mopping doesn't remove it - it needs a scrub brush and some elbow grease. Apparently this sort of cleaning is akin to "We don't do windows" for the people we pay to do the heavy cleaning twice a month. They "sanitize" the floors but I'm asking you - what good is sanitized grime in the scheme of things?
I have a throw rug at the back slider that has become quite muddy from the constant ins and outs of dogs and kids. The yard is a muddy mess from way too much rain and constant walking on during last weekends building of the play structure. The rug needs to be washed (again) and yet, the washing machine seems to be constantly filled with clothes needing to be washed and well, I can't wash this nasty dirty rug with clothes that my kids will be wearing. Oh - and I have a few pair of shoes and boots in varying sizes that need to be cleaned, too.
There are bath toys that need to be gone through and sorted out. I swear it is getting difficult to find room to put the kids in the tub with all the toys that have taken up residency in there. And you just might be amazed and what becomes a bath toy at a moments notice.
I need to go through the various art supply drawers that Kelton has and reorganize them. It means tossing things out which means I can't do it when Kelton is around. Everything is "special" to him and therefore, must be kept "forever". I wouldn't mind if he had a 1600sq foot house of his own for JUST his art supplies and projects.
I need to scrapbook more pages. I want to set a weekly goal and reach it. It's important for me that the kids have stuff like that. (See above. Same reason.)
I need to clean things off my hard drive and move other things to my external hard drive.
I need to do some serious blog maintenance. My blog roll is completely out of date and I feel guilty each time I see it.
I need to redo my will.
I need to be sure guardianship papers for Kaylen are completed and that Kelton's are updated.
I need to start shopping for Dakota and Kelton's birthdays.
I need to figure out what I would like to give Dakota for our 12th wedding anniversary.
I need to have Dakota clean the carpets before they drive me batty (again with the mud, kids and pets)
I need to change the sheets on all the beds.
I want, I need.
The list is endless, isn't it? I'm sure there are more but those are the things sitting at the front of my mind. So I ask again; why am I sitting here?
14 comments:
It is actually in my will that my blog must be printed out and bound for the boys because I also want them to have evidence of my deep and unending love for them.
You are smart to think about doing it now.
Do you two have wills?
Mieke: Yes, we have wills. They just haven't been updated since before Kaylen was born. It covers her, of course, with the line :and any other children blah blah blah" but I won't feel right about it until they are redone.
The guardian we set up for Kelton is on board for Kaylen, too, but again...I want it in clean, irrefutable writing.
Printing out the blog seems so daunting, doesn't it? *sigh*
You know, I have (almost) finally come to the conclusion - and it's a sad one, that my "To Do" list will never, ever be done. I swear to you Casey - I have "Check to see if there is a spare tire in the van" and duh, we bought the damn van in December 2004. YES, that has been on my "To Do" list for now, a little over 2 years!!! Why haven't I checked? I don't have a good reason, I just haven't. I also have all the same crap on my list that you do - i.e. clean out Foster's closet - I mean good Lord, the boy is 5.5 and I still have the 2T stuff hanging up in there. Altho now, I can just move it from his closet to the twins' closet.
Whew, where did that come from? Sorry to hijack your comment section but I just wanted to let you know that I understand and you are so not the only person who had a never-ending "To Do" list. Hmmmm, that's a good idea for a blog posting for me to do. Maybe if I put it out there for all the world to see, I'll be shamed into checking to see if I do in fact have a spare tire. How sad is that?
It's just too daunting to think of at once all the things that need to get done. Maybe if you resolve to work on 1 thing per week it would make it seem easier?
Girl, your list is impressive! I couldn't even tell you what is on my list. I prefer to play stupid. But hearing you talk about the dang vinyl floor - I am with you 100%. My floor is starting to talk to me it has so much 'personality'. My very lame reasoning for not tackling it? "We are going to move soon enough, and that's when I'll clean this house REALLY well". We may, of course, not move for three more years.
I am so with you on this. I bow down to people that also handle working outside the home on top of it all. I have a huge to do list as well as weekly and daily lists. It's worse since we just got back from vacation but I am on the verge of freaking out about how much has to be done. When I am in this mood, I have such a hard time balancing guilt about playing with the kids vs. housework.
I do try to follow Flylady's Wednesday as anti-procrastination day and tackle one item that never seems to get done. Amy K. gave me a good suggestion of writing down what I did do during a day rather than worrying about nothing getting crossed off my list.
Anyways, I feel your pain!!!!!
You are five steps ahead of me. I keep thinking I need to WRITE a to do list...I can't even get that organized! :o)
Girl I am on the want/need train with you!
I agree, the fact that you even have a list is impressive. My list is floating in my overwhelmed head. I must say it's comforting to know other mamas are going through the same thing! My aunt gave us (as a x-mas present) a housekeeper for the day. She organized my kitchen cupboards and really scrubbed behind everything (something I couldn't bring myself to do). It was invaluable, and you might want to make the investment. Just having someone here helping me clean, allowed me some time to do the "other" stuff on my list. And it got me motivated. Good luck and remember to breathe!
Ivy: Stop what you are doing and go check your spare tire, ok? Go on. I'll wait for you. :) Feel free to hijack any time. I actually enjoy. And see? You rprocrastination paid off. You don't have to box up the 2T's...all you have to do is move closets! :)
Laura: Maybe! I did manage to wrap two of the gifts I had on my list. One is ready for hand delivery tomorrow and the other is ready for the post office. YAY ME! :)
Nikki: I love your reason! I wish I could use it. My reason is "It's just going to need to be done again." :)
Perrin: Making a list of things accomplished; that's a good way to at least feel like you are doing *something* I like that. :) And I'm with you - I have no clue how working moms get it all done either. I admire them.
Brenda: You crack me up!
Patti_Cake: Glad to have you aboard the train!
FroggyMama: The sad thing is, I actually have a cleaning crew that comes in every two weeks to do the bathrooms, kitchen, etc. (it was part of the deal when Dakota went back to school. That way didn't have to spend out precious family hours scrubbing bathrooms and I wasn't left to add her part of the household chores to my list). And yet, I can still see where I would love to have someone come in a do a few very specific tasks that get overlooked. Hmmm...good idea. :) At least I can dream. LOL! And you are right, somehow it feels better to know I'm not alone in the ever growing TO DO list.
Casey, I wanted to copy and paste my blog too, but that just seems so overwhelming. What I did instead was to go to the archives, one month at a time, and print them as a .pdf document. Then print them out and I cut each post out and put it on a scrapbook page. It was way easier than copying and pasting. In fact, if you don't have adobe, I can do it for you. :)
Well, hot damn, you just wrote my blog that I have been neglecting. Almost word for word. May I cut and paste? Nah, that's cheating isn't it? ARGH! Why do we have to much to do? That is what I want to know.
I find myself spending a lot of time blogging with a large "To Do" list looming over my head. BUT, everyone always tells us "Make sure you take care of yourself". I feel blogging is "MY TIME". I'm sharing my thoughts, feelings, and connecting with friends. I need this and it should not be a guilty pleasure. Take the time and enjoy it! You're choosing to blog versus mopping the floor. It will get done eventually. Do the kids and dogs really care of the floor is clean? My dogs definitely don't. I mopped it yesterday and already have muddy paw prints everywhere.
Kristen: What a great idea and thanks for the offer. I may end up taking you up on it.
Wendy: You and me both!
Dee: You are so right - the kids and dogs don't give a flying hoot about the floors. :) I need to remind myself of that more often.
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